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With Every Goodbye

from Letters to Aliens by Rhyan Sinclair

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about

“I didn’t have ‘With Every Goodbye’ on the initial track list for the record, because of the personal nature of the lyrics. It deals, in part, with my biological father who passed away last year. I wouldn’t have felt comfortable or safe releasing it when he was alive. I threw that song at the band at the very end of the recording session one day and it just worked. It was a really cathartic experience, kind of a full-circle moment. It marked the beginning of taking back my personal power by telling the story that I’d never told.” - Rhyan Sinclair

lyrics

Papaw and I were the best of friends
We'd name squirrels and count cars for hours on end
I was only six years old when he died
It took me eight after that to be able to cry
And I've never felt more pain than I did with that goodbye

Don't know how momma did it when it all went wrong
But she kept me close and she kept me strong
Loss kept on hitting home
The family we knew were turning into ghosts
And we've never been more broken than we were by those goodbyes

Saying goodbye is a strange old thing
Just one word carries so much weight
So much power at the hands of fate
With every goodbye

I made friends, but they never really stuck
I guess you could say I was haunted growing up
I tried to be funny and the kids'd sure laugh
When the deadpan jokes I told fell flat
And I've never been more fine than I was with those goodbyes

I grew older and my eyes turned green
Told my father "See ya never" and I changed my name
All he ever did was lash out and then deny
Nothing's ever held more rage than his venom eyes
And Ii've never felt more freedom than I did with that goodbye

Saying goodbye is a strange old thing
Just one word carries so much weight
Putting the power in the hands of fate
With every goodbye

Said goodbye to the little girl crying in the corner
Of a house that was caving in
Said goodbye to all that walking in the darkness
Thinking it'd never end
Said goodbye to the helpless, boundless, reckless pain I thought I had to live in

Saying goodbye is a strange old thing
Just one word carries so much weight
Putting the power in the hands of fate
with every goodbye

and I've never felt more pain than I did in forgetting

and I've never felt more freedom than I did in forgetting

Saying goodbye...

credits

from Letters to Aliens, released March 4, 2022
Rhyan Sinclair - Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, Keys
Danny Flanigan - Electric Guitar, Background Vocals
Jeff Binder - Bass, Background Vocals
Cary Shields - Drums, Percussion
Toni Karpinski - Harmony Vocals

"With Every Goodbye" written by Rhyan Sinclair
Produced by Rhyan Sinclair and Jason Groves
Engineered and mastered by Jason Groves at Sneak Attack Recording Co. in Lexington, KY

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Rhyan Sinclair Lexington, Kentucky

Cosmic Americana from Lexington, KY.

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